By far, the most common question people ask me is, “When are you going back to Haiti?” and since April 18, the answer has been, “June 14.” Over and over people expressed surprise. “But that’s so far away!” And it was. But now the date is drawing close, and last minute preparations are being made.
And my heart is happy.
It’s been a while since I took such a long break from Haiti. But this break was so needed. I had become a little weary, a little overwhelmed, in need of a sabbatical of sorts. On March 12, through tears, I shared the following with our Haitian staff. It was that day that I realized how weary I had become.
How can a place so foreign become so familiar?
How can I have more questions, fewer answers?
How can the place where I am so completely different become the place where I feel most accepted?
How can a place so broken be so whole?
How can a place that is far from home be the truest form of home?
How can these amazing individuals I've known for a few short years be the very people who know me most fully?
How can there be so much joy mingled with so much heartbreak?
How can one explain something for which there is no explanation?
How does one remain hopefully optimistic?
I still don’t have answers to these questions (and I know I probably never will), but my heart is more settled, more at peace. During this time away God has used so many people here in Wilmington to fill up my heart, remind me who I am, and encourage me.
Every week I have gone to The Bridge with expectation of hearing and seeing God, and each week I’ve walked away overwhelmed by the beauty and majesty of our Saviour.
In His power, in His strength, I am ready for a busy summer in Haiti, doing life with the amazing staff of Haiti Awake and the sweet American friends who will join us this summer.
More than ever I find truth in the words of Frederick Buechner:
Haiti Cheri, m’ap vini! I can hardly wait for the first night I am there, sitting on the roof, listening to this song by Leeland, and praising Jesus for allowing me to know and love and walk the journey of life with some of the most amazing people in the entire world.